PMBD

As you know, Gwendolyne and I get a lot of PMs, many offering booty, some begging for booty, others asking questions or just generally being friendly.

However, some days we get some especially....um....friendly PMs:



If you really want to see our penis, click on Crammyboy's Penis. (http://www.moreawesomethanyou.com/smf/index.php/topic,6200.0.html)

But really. We are both women. We don't have penises. We don't know of any pay penises, and frankly, Crammyboy's is the best. Do us a favor and don't ask us for penises or any other body parts, 'kay?


EDIT: Oh, and I have an axe. Remember the Bobbitts? Whackity whack!

Not even boobies :cry: I thought all the cults offered boobies.

But you'd let ME see your penis, right? Because I'm special, right?

Hmmmm...

From now on, when referring to the person who sent you that email, I shall refer to s/h/it as "The Penis Asker".

Why?

Just cuz...

How RUDE!

Ha! Thats nothing on what Beos gets at Insim. If you ever feel like you'd want to be sick, ask him about it sometime.

Lets just say penis demands are pretty tame.

So can we see it already?

I don't know why, but this is really cracking me up.
All those smileys maybe.  I think someone went a bit overboard on the smileys.

That reminds me of Deadwood, they had a character they called the titlicker. :lol:  :lol:
He would leave the saloon and they would say something like "there's that degenerate titlicker" He would pay all the sallon girls to line up and he would come out wiping his mouth. :lol:  :lol:  :lol:

Eh, I'm pretty sure you brought that one on yourself, Hecubus.  I seem to recall you whirling around your invisi-penis.   :lol:

Nooooo. It was me that got the pm. But I could not help, I'm a girl  :lol:

Awww. Nobody ever asked to see my penis.  :(

Oh, all right.

Here is my penis.



REQUISITE 'IF YOU'RE UNDER 18 AND/OR ARE OFFENDED BY EROTIC IMAGES, GO AWAY' STATEMENT.




(http://i168.photobucket.com/albums/u194/MusicalMaven/t-ssi-1642.jpg)


You can get your very own, from http://www.blowfish.com/catalog/toys/jock_harnesses.html.

Roffles!  I like how the penis of doom is very close to "your" flesh color. :)

I could have posted a pic of the electric blue one, but I know that I'd rather NOT have my sex partners laughing at my fake tool, yanno?

I understand!  :wink: My personal penis of doom is translucent purple.  ^.~

Penis of doom? Is that anything like the Spork of Doom?
and mine is a pretty eletric blue with a vibrating dolphin on it. I got it for my birthday, bought it myself...

Thanks a lot ladies. LOL I've just spit water out all over my desk.

Penis of Doom > Spork of Doom

I don't remember where the term was coined but I've known it for a long time.. probably from chat.

And you're welcome, Chinchillagrl. :D

Actually I heard that boesboxboys penis is way better, and he models it on his own.   :lol:   Well thats what he said at insim.

What, are you talking about that horse dick? He wishes he was that hung.

WOW!

Well... ahem *bursts out laughing even though her ribs are already aching from the five minute laughing jag brought on by the original post*

We not only have Booty and boobies, we have penises! I'm telling you, this board/site has EVERYTHING...   :shock:

Maybe the person thought you were a she-male or a hermaphrodite? Good heavens! Of all the things to ask...

*goes off on another laughing jag...*

This has suddenly got me wondering what kind of PM's Pescado gets :lol: :lol: :lol:

So are my two.  :oops:

Thinking about that is a surefire route to madness. DON'T DO IT! Think of the chilluns! D:

NOTHING CAN DEFEAT THE PENIS!!

Tee hee hee. Some people think of the funniest things. ^^

So uhm can I touch your penis?

That's how we got in trouble the LAST time, Kathy!

Sheesh.

 :shock:

Ya know Kathy had a love child by a Penis of doom.... well that's what I heard from a forum, who told another forum, who emailed it to Lyric, who had her 12 year old lacky message Pescado.

Yes, yes, more drama and rumor for Kathy and Hecubus, cause they like drama. LMAO!



 :lol:

I didn't mean to knock you up. And you are the one who gave my baby to the nuns.

You don't wanna see mine..........

Like the wife sez.........skinny white boy hung like a big black boy,rofl.......

replete w/ elephant balls.........

yeah, no frigging lie.

Guess it's God's way of making up for my having a bi-lateral cleft lip (harelip) and cleft palate...

God: Ok, his speech is a lil off........hmmm.....I know, let his penis do all the talking!

Yeah we have heard it all before. Every guy on the internet has some monsterous cock. Reality it's 3 inches hard and on the net it's 15 inches.  :roll:

I'd like, for once, have a guy say, "Yeah, I have a small dick but I know how to work it!"  Big pennor doesn't mean you have any sexual skill.

Or a guy with a small dick who doesn't try to jackhammer you to overcompensate the fact that he comes up a little short.

Honestly, mine is about 9 at max, and 6-7 limp.....no shit....

So 9ins on the internet = 1 1/2 in? Seriously dude we don't give a fuck.

You'd probably get more respect around here if you admitted to less than 4 inches or being a eunuch, much more likely to be true. If you really do have a big dick you need to develop your superiority complex and keep it to yourself. Believe me, no one else on the planet cares if you haven't even got one.

Only people who sleep with you care about the size of your schlong and having a wife pretty much kills your ability to find anyone new to share it with. This is a good thing, embrace it.

Here! Here! I get so sick of that. It's not the size, but the skill of the owner. I already have to hear about my mom's boy toy's endowment, I don't want to hear anymore!

You know what's better? Boobies. Yes they are.

Look, I just find it ironic, after all I've been thru, this, as I joke, is how God & fate makes things up to me. Second,um, why would I feel the need to lie? Me and the wife are happy, I'm never going to meet any ladies from this forum in person, so again, why lie. I just find the whole shit funny. Twenty-five operations by age 30, 2 car wrecks, motorcycle wreck, several suicide attempts as a teen, so I'm rewarded by still being here, having a level head, and being "endowed" compared to my height and weight. To me, all that is funny as fuck..........cosmic joke....

Yea, going to have to agree with that one.

This forum just keeps entertaining. ;)

I like my wife's boobs alot.......DD's........


Thanks...........for the mammaries.......
So nice and plump, and soft and round.......
Thanks......for the mammaries.......

(Sung to Bob Hope's theme "Thanks for the memories")

I don't know what I'd be doing without those. ( But they're kind of  annoying when it's cold outside. )
:roll:

BionixWV:  You're married.  No one wants to hear about your ding dong.

Boobies > Penis of Doom

Reason?  You can dress up your breasts to look better!  Who wears outfits that accentuate their ball accessories??   :lol:

I was born with a perfect lip and palate... Guess what God did to me to make up for it?  :cry:

You have a small penis?  :oops:

I actually wish my butt was a little bigger. Not wider but rounder. I had a friend tell me "You know, you're the only black girl I know that has a flat butt" I was like :shock: Never been told that before.
That bitch. I miss working with her. She was fun. Nice to know she was checking out my ass though.

Lemmiwinks has an anti-penis...   :shock:  :lol:

At least I learned to be creative with it!  :wink:

Oh , I been there and understand, wonder how in the hell those guys keep a girlfriend. :?

My personal penis of doom is asleep in the next room. :lol:

Feverish , I'm glad I'm not the only one that wants a bigger ass. I want to knock stuff over when I walk by. :D

I just can't stop looking at Hecubus's penis. It's so......curvy. I think I wish mine did that but I'm not sure. :?

Seriously. Big dicks scare me. Like, a lot. All my boyfriends had smaller-to-normal ones, and I was quite happy....with all but one. But that was the guy, not the dick.

lol, prefer sorta averageish myself. Mostly because I'm a small person and if ya try and go in too far it bloody well hurts!  :P

Oy, long dicks are lame, unless you're into having your cervix smashed into. I'm not into that myself.  :x  
It's all about the girth. If I could find a guy with a 3 inch dick that was nice and thick, I'd be in heaven....

Too bad most men believe those stupid ass extenze commercials with the porn sluts talking about how EVERY woman wants 12 inches. :roll:  I wish I could reach through the screen and whack them in the head with a baseball bat.  :lol:

Like the characters "J-ello" from "Date Movie", or that big assed robot from "Robots" kinda big?

I can see this thread turning into a PMBD orgy fest  :lol:  :lol:

I don't know, enough to make people say DAMN that's a big ass!  :lol:  :lol:  :lol:

That penis in the photo was very 'interesting looking'... LOL

I prefer a rounded tushy that knocks things over than a flat one anyday.. and since the subject was penises.. average rules in my opinion.

Asses: you can have some of mine. Really. I'll gladly give up some of the badonka in my butt.

Curvy penises: great for toys, odd for flesh. You can envy mine, though...it doesn't get in the way and it always stays hard. And it's never hairy.

Girth: At some point, too wide is too wide.

Length: At some point, too long is too long.

Conclusion: there's a reason the average penis is just under 6 inches erect.

I do recall seeing a 'behind the scenes' flick with some porn stars from the late 80s, and they talked about the 'novelty' of schlongs like Ron Jeremy's, but that they were more than satisfied, and actually happier, with average sized penises. One (Ginger Lynn, maybe?) rather complained that too much hurt, and there were times she was just too sore/bruised to work.


This thread is killin' me...I don't know what I thought would result when I posted that PM Gwendolyne showed me, but I'm pretty sure it wasn't this! Too funny.

My husband worked with a lady much like you, she was absolutely beautiful and elegant, tall and thin... BUT.... no booty. She also got teased (good natured) like your friend did you, my husband would always take up for her and call her our Nubian Princess. So next time someone says that to you just tell them you need no booty, you are a Nubian princess and BTG said so.  :wink:




Words of wisdom Hecubus. :D

But... what's the reason for its fugliness? To be honest I have never seen a pretty penis in my life! Perhaps that's why some people do it in the dark...  :lol:

I did not know what I expected when I showed you that pm. I only thought you'd like to have something that is different from the usual "Can you updates Chazdesigns Britney asap?" .
Well, what you got is a thread that is somehow, ehm different  :shock:
And, yes I looove this thread  :D

Could I please have more pms like that?

Ha - now scream it at the top of your voice!



Just get yourself some syphilis - that makes your dick curvy like that. :shock:

hi every1 im new!!!!!!! *holds up spork* my name is katy but u can call me t3h PeNgU1N oF d00m!!!!!!!! lol...as u can see im very random!!!! thats why i came here, 2 meet random ppl like me ^_^... im 13 years old (im mature 4 my age tho!!) i like 2 watch invader zim w/ my girlfreind (im bi if u dont like it deal w/it) its our favorite tv show!!! bcuz its SOOOO random!!!! shes random 2 of course but i want 2 meet more random ppl =) like they say the more the merrier!!!! lol...neways i hope 2 make alot of freinds here so give me lots of commentses!!!!

DOOOOOMMMM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! <--- me bein random again ^_^ hehe...toodles!!!!!

love and waffles,
*~t3h PeNgU1N oF d00m~*

- Well someone had to say it, 90% chance you won't get it it's just a internet meme.

Oh and I forget, because I am a guy on the internet, my penis is 12 inches long.

Shall I send you a PM asking if I can see your boobies (since you don't have a penis)? AND if you don't mind that I can not properly form sentences in German, I can even do it in German. :lol:

Ah, big asses.  I have been both blessed and cursed with one of my own.
Mostly cursed.  It's annoyingly hard to find jeans when your hips and rump are about twice your waist.  Then you get that little 'gap' in the back, right near the small of your back, because the waist is bigger than your waist but has to be to accommodate your rear.
Might as well put your panties on display.

One of my exes had this beautiful, clean one with almost no hair. Perfectly smooth even when happy. It was freaking awesome. He was a needy twit, though.

:shock:  :shock:  :shock:  :shock:  :shock:  :shock:  :shock:  :shock:


This thread scares me. :?  :?  :?



But of course, as I also have a male personality on the internet (I'm not joking. I'm actually pretty good at playing a gay male emo, I promise you!) my penis is far too long to mention. Much longer than it should be, by at least 10 inches...



It's alright, Jake's a gay homophobic womaniser (that always amuses me); he'll get no use out of it and so therefore won't hurt any unsuspecting girls. ;)



This thread reminds me of hoochymail.com's stories inolving mucho euphemisms. Guys, have you ever heard your penis be called a "lieutenant", a "hoedown", a "ne'er do well", a "louver", a "real estate", a "swan", an "urchin", an "ice cube", a "metronome", a "saucepan", a "hazelnut", a "neighbourhood", an "orangutan", an "eclipse", a "dormitory", a "clamshell", a "wordsmith", a "guitar"...okay, I'm gonna shut up now, but some of those euphemisms are fucking hilarious!

Hecubus, I might need some of that badonkadonk you're willing to get rid of :D  Also, and since we're on the subject, any boobies to spare? Anyone? :lol:

For the record, I don't like shaved guys, mostly because unless they are PERFECTLY accurate about it - a talent appearently only gay guys truly possess without necessarily being self-absorbed egomaniacs all the time - do you have any idea of what happens when the hairs start to grow back? :shock: :?

I got it, but couldn't figure ut what it had to do with penii.

Some of us also read ED and the Goonboards, y'know. ;)

I think it all really just depends on the razor or how his hair is to begin with. Boyfriend doesn't seem to have problems, but then again he might not want to tell me...



YES! Effin' hell! If I don't wear a belt I get that. Not that the belt helps as much as it should because the pants STILL slide down and I have to pull them up anyway but it's waaaaaay better than if I wasn't wearing one.


I will totally donate some of the 'junk' in my 'trunk'. Then maybe I won't have to wear my 'fat pants' anymore and can go back to wearing that pair of jeans that I miss.

I hearby offer half of mine. Please take half of each, not one, because just having one of my size would probably make me topple over. Instant C's for you!

We're sharing boobies now? I'd like the request just enough to get to a full C, if anyone has got some to spare. This "nearly C" crap is annoying. It's like my boobs couldn't make up their minds between B and C, so they stopped between the two. Arrrg.

I'm 27 and it seems like mine won't stop growing. I gain 5 pounds and I'm coming out of a 34d. I also notice my back aching sometimes. I had a C until I took birth control for a couple years. I would seriously consider a reduction if it didn't look so damn painful. Fake boobs must be lighter, because people with fake ones never complain about their back hurting. Why anyone would want a D cup is a mystery to me. The stupid things are just in the way at this point. If I could deflate my boobs and transfer it around back I would be happy. :lol:

You could just lop them off and learn to shoot arrows.

I think boobs causing back ache probably also has something to do with the way the weight is distributed over your body, your height/weight and stuff like that. I've got 32DD boobs (and for a few days a month, 34E boobs) and I've never had back ache (except when I've done something that strains my back of course). I have a friend who has F cup breasts and one with double F cup breasts and they don't have problems either, but I know a girl with F cup breasts who has terrible back ache and her doctor has recommended that she get a reduction on the NHS. She's very tall and slim, and her doctor said her frame just wasn't capable of dealing with the weight of her breasts.

I wonder if they do breast lifts on the NHS... 23 years old and I have the norks of an 80 year old. :cry:

I'm a bit pudgy (just a bit...*cough*) and I have reasonably big boobs, but if I didn't carry the extra baggage they'd be much smaller, which kinda sucks. My friend is skinny as hell and has really big boobs, which her boyfriend loves. :roll: I get backache but that's probably just my weight distribution and posture.

36DD/F I think if my conversion is correct, here. I'm short and I'm not very thin and I do believe that most of my backpains are due to my boobs. Also, they get in the way sometimes.

But you know, I've never lost an argument with a male after they reached their current size...  :lol:

People were talking about penises of doom so why not the penguin of DOOOOOOOMMMMMMMM

I will gladly serve as a boob donor, I've had the damn things since I was nine! When I got preg at age 24, they were a nice perky B cup, which I loved... Then, they went to a D and stayed there ever fucking since! Don't like! Want reduction! Willing to give away to a good home!
As for ass, will donate that, too! I was one of those gals that didn't seem to have much, but what I had was wonderfully rounded. When I rode a bike, most guys knew who I was without looking at my face and it wasn't cause I slept around... Tiny round ass... Same as above, willing to donate to good home... I don't get much for back pains, the pain is to my self image and such... I look at pictures from that time period and realize that people weren't yanking my chain, I was pretty. Never believed them til now... But at the present time, I feel like a water buffalo with pierced ears... Anyhow!
As for the penis of doom, I plan on getting another one soon, without the dolphin this time, but in the same colour... Of course, a male friend of mine said he's going to get one of those "Clone a Willy" kits and make a replica of his for me as a gag late birthday gift... I won't complain, I always liked it way back when we were intimate like that! Wheeeeeeeee!

You probably look fine now, too. Do yourself a favour and never worry about it again! :lol: Trust me, you'll be better for it.

You just need to figure out a way to beat people to death with them in melee combat.


Doesn't work on me, nyah. :P I won't be impressed until I see you smother someone to death with them.

Does a breast smothering count towards the "thumb death" count?

*enters thread, grabs random boobies and ass and staggers away with treasure* :D

*oh, and passes rum*

I want to know that too! That might seriously add to the number of ways I can do people in...  :lol:

I don't know about arrows, I like bullets better. (unless I'm in front of them)   :wink:

Bullets are much more efficient, but Pes is stuck in the future, after the apocalypse when bullets are no longer available. Hence his obsession with thumbs and other forms of manual killing.

In that case, I'm going to have to practice boob smothering or I'm screwed!! :shock:

If I have to die, I cannot think of a more pleasant way to go...  :wink:
That which giveth life also taketh away life. Some kind of poetic justice in there.

I won't need to practice. I'm planning on running my own Thunderdome after the apocalypse, at which point I'll have enough resources coming in to hire my own boob smotherers.

My husband would be happy to die in such a way - but only if it were put on his tombstone, and everybody knew about it.  :lol:

Well I do often give myself black eyes with them whenever I have to move faster than the rate of a slow stroll and not supported by steel scaffolding, does that do anything for you Pescado?
I'd never thought of using them as an offensive weapon...

LMAO  :lol:  :lol:  :lol:  :lol:  :lol:

But... couldn't you linked the penis image somewhere. I didn't like the underwear round it, made me think of BDSM.  :shock:  :shock: You wanna know about mine? Its kinda embarrassing  :oops:  :oops:  and worse of all, I can't use the male urinals properly  :oops:  :oops:  :oops:  :oops:

Should I have said that? Its shorter than an ant with stunted growth. 3 inches max at the age of 14.(or maybe even lesser than that)

 :cry:  :cry: I have no idea whether its normal or not. Can I cry?  :cry:  :cry:
Maybe reading some conspiracy theories on Pescado would cheer me up.

Well, I can't use a gun, but I'm decent with knives. We should still have those, right?

Also, I'm 15 and I have a C-cup. I'd be fine with it if I didn't know I was going to grow up to have a DD. Both my mother and grandmother were large.
It could be worse for me, though. One of my friends, a couple months younger than I am, already has DD. The poor thing.

My ass is SO flat. The only time I knock stuff over is when I hit them with my pants, as I wear large, baggy guy's cargo pants. :D

Raekira, I am your future.

I was a C in middle school. But freshman year, a D. I was a DD by the time I graduated. Now, I really should be a DDD, but I chose to go with a larger bandsize, cinch it,  and keep the DD. It actually works better for their positioning for me. At least they keep up and happy while they are in a bra. Nothing looks worse than huge floopy boobs. Out of a bra, well, gravity's a bitch. Don't really have back pain, though. I started to get twinges about a year ago in my lower back. I do these exercises...kind of like reverse crunches with a resistence band...and it really strengthens my back. Helps with posture, too.

And flat ass? Yup. Got that. It's so flat that it hurts to do pilates because my tailbone has no padding.

I used to wear a sports bra all the time. They were comfortable, and gave me the support I needed. I also had to use sports bras because the hooks were just so uncomfortable on normal bras. My mum made me get some normal ones, and I'm so pissy all the time because they're uncomfortable.
And I hate NOT wearing something to have support. If I had my own money, I'd buy myself some more sports bras and be done with it, but I can't get a job [mum's interference again  :evil:]. Now I have permanent marks on my chest from the damn hooks. Plus, I can only get underwire bras with the hook in front, so aside from the marks from the hooks I have lines under my boobs from the fucking underwire.
The lady in the bra department was like, "Oh yeah, it's best to wear normal brassieres blah blah blah I'm an old fart and don't know what I'm talking about!" I felt like punching her. She probably was wearing corsets, for god's sake, she was so old. -_-

Ok, I have the breast flinging melee thing down to an art form, ditto with the smothering. I can also shoot a bow with a fair amount of accuracy and use a slingshot as well. My hands are well-muscled from all of the leather working and carpentry stuff I do, so killing with the hands would be easy. Also, a use for a traditional bra? You got it! Use it to sling stones at peoples. My dad also taught me how to throw a knife and a hatchet, as well as a cast iron skillet. I also can shoot a rifle and handgun. Would you say that I'm well prepared to defend myself during the after times? I also know how to field dress most wild game, as well as gut/descale fish and get a bird ready to cook. Somehow, even though I can't ask him any more, I think Dad was making sure that I could take care of myself when it comes crashing down... But I don't know how I'd do without my Bic lighter... Do you have any damn clue how hard it is to use flint and steel to light a smoke?! Well, I suppose I could always grab a lit twig out of the campfire, but still....

Paden, you are hired! Please come find me after the skies have turned to fire and the rivers have turned to blood. You can be manager of my "Boob Smotherers" security force.

Well, if anyone needs a devious mind with them, I'm here. Need someone interrogated? No prob.........just give me a dozen small glass rods, some rope, and I'll have the person singing like a church choir. Need to get back at someone? Hmmm...........oh the many ways.......right now, I'm currently sucking my ex-brother in laws bank account dry thru online means as he'd rather be a dick STILL to my older sis and niece, and not leave them alone. Evil is not just evil, the unspoken evil is the best, the minds that think things up, but never just act on them in a snap, but rather calculate when to use the methods, now thats fucking scary.

You shouldn't be getting lines from the underwires. It sounds like they are hitting the wrong spot. Probably too low, I have issues finding bras that don't do that as well. I've become a total snob about getting one bra and only one bra...by Lane Bryant, brand is Cacique...they have these microfiber or cotton demi bras that fit super well, don't gap, and feel almost like having nothing on. No itchy, no pinches, no marks. I have to use only cotton bras because of this nasty recurrent rash I got from pregnisone when I was in the hospital five years ago. Wearing cotton cuts down on the itchy. And no stupid front closure. Front closures aren't for big boobages, people!

I'm sorry, I am only hiring "Boob Smotherers" at the moment. Your name is being kept on file for future employment opportunities.

I wear a 38DD and what annoys me is how many more styles are available for A-C cups, and beyond that most brands only concern themselves with function.  I've found a couple of cute bras over time but for the most part it seems they're marketed toward the smaller sizes. :(

They must think we all like granny bras or something. I buy mine from Fredrick's of Hollywood, they have some nice styles all the way up to F (thank god!), and they last reasonably well. I always take out the little padded push up thingies though, I have no need for cleavage up to my neck, thanks.

I was always jealous about the A-F cups that european and north american have. We here only have 38-54 or S-XL and if your boobies doesn't fit the cup of your number, it sucks. I'm 42 but my bras are all 46.  :|
Also, men should learn once and for all that it's not the size of your wand that counts, but the magic you can do with it.

MAGIC?..Hmmm.....lemme try.........*drops shorts and "points" at computer*............FLY AROUND THE ROOM.............Damn.....no magic there.........

Yes, I'm a smart ass, or smart dick..........rofl

Oh Well, all this talk about huge dongs and busts, and here I sit with only my 10 inch tongue to amuse myself...  8)

Silly BionixWV, you need to enroll into Hogwarts first!  :lol:

I don't think my boobs are huge, but I do wished they were smaller.

I feel your pain; I'm also a 38DD and recently went shopping in a bra shop that was closing down, to find that all the bras that fitted me were those horrid sports and support bras. All the frilly and fancy ones were for smaller sizes :?

I don't know if this will help, but if I had it to do over I would avoid any kind of hormonal birth control. I noticed a big change with the pill , but by that time, it was too late. :(  I know plenty of people who take it and don't have that side effect , but just be aware that it does happen.

Broomhilda, what? You quoted me, but I am confused.

...Were you talking about my friend? If you were, I honestly have no idea if she's on the pill or not. I'm not that close to her. *sweatdrop*

raekira, I meant you. lol I was trying to warn you to watch out if you ever decide to take birth control pills, because if you are already a C cup , you might wake up a DD. I think that is what caused my boobs to keep growing when I was 19, even though I hit puberty around 11 or 12.

The best big bras do tend to be in the UK and Europe :P If anyone with big boobs needs help with sizing, brands and/or retailers of decent bras in the US, I can recommend two lj communties: this one (http://community.livejournal.com/bustingout/) is more general and this one (http://community.livejournal.com/thirty_twod/) is for people with a small band size and large cup size. :)

That happened to a very 'close' freind of mine, she got on the 'patch', went from C to DD.  She had augmentation many years ago, after the increase she had them removed, now a D.  She has stated she wished she knew this years ago, patch is much cheaper then surgery, less painful too.

Well, I'll be sure to warn my friends who do take the pill. I'll also have to watch out myself, because I may be forced to go on the pill [for a different reason].

No, no, Willy, you can come sit by me... *pats seat next to her in a friendly manner* :twisted:

I can't be the only one who appreciates a good-sized tongue, can i...?

Same here.



I never wear underwired bras because they're painful. Mine are all wireless. I also don't see the point in pretty bras OR sports bras--unless you have an active sex life no-one's gonna see them anyway. Same with knickers.

You can wear them for yourself. I don't need anyone else to see my undies to appreciate them.

I still think you guys are not wearing the right size or not wearing it right (straps not taut/no efficient weight distribution) if underwire bras hurt you..

You can wear pretty underwear/bras to make yourself feel good.  Nice fabric also feels nice against your skin.  You should be able to enjoy yourself!

As I said once before, my breasts are far apart on my chest, and I have yet to find an underwire to work - even the woman in a Manhattan boutique said "wow, you just can't wear underwires unless someone hand made you a bra"...she then quoted a price to which I thought "for that, I could get implants."

Imagine...the only time I have actual 'cleavage' is when I hug myself. Otherwise...these 42Cs each stand (read: sag) alone.

Really. Not every woman who has problems with underwires doesn't know how to wear them.

Yeah! My breasts are also sort of far apart, so the underwire digs in especially underneath and a little on the sides. Most women/teens with c-cups have their boobs touching, if only a little. Mine don't. At all.

I've got the same problem. Mine a far apart. I hate underwire too. It's too damn uncomfortable.

Hum, I'm a B cup--no problems finding bras in my size.  I love my breasts.  I have little trouble with them.  The only thing that bothers me is that one of my nipples is larger than the other (it's not a very significant size difference, but I'm critical of myself and obsessed with symmetry), and they're puffy (obviously when not stiff).

As for my bottom, I am okay with it.  It's not large, but it's not small.  However, I cannot sit on my bottom on a hard surface for long, because it hurts my tail-bone.  I have to sit with my feets under my butt (or at least one, but again with the symmetry, it's generally both).

I wear size 7 in jeans.  I don't have a hard time finding jeans or panties.  Mostly it's shirts I have troubles with--I can't find any plain, solid fucking black shirts for women.

All in all, I are hapy with my bodie.

Awww...size 7...that was so many years ago...probably when I was about your age.  :lol:
And being happy with your body...that is awesome.  I never have been, even when I was a 7.  But that's just my insecurities.

I can't sit on hard surfaces very long either. I was waxing my legs a few months ago, which took forever, and sitting on the toilet seat for so long really sucked. I think I bruised my ischium and could hardly sit, even on cushions, for over a week. My butt looks just fine when I'm standing, but once I sit it's bony as hell.

Now speaking of breast symmetry, and this may be TMI, but my areolas are way too large for my breast size. I measured them before and they have a 2 1/2 inch diameter, which makes my between B and C breasts look like cones (and I'm not too fond of the Madonna look) unless I have some heavy padding in my bras. Not only do the nipples annoy me, but my right breast is much larger than my left. They're both between B and C, but the left is much closer to being a B while the right is almost a C. Bra shopping really sucks with such weird boobs. I almost want to get breast implants just to even things out.  :?

...erm, yeah, I hope I'm still invitied to the orgy with weird boobies.

Don't get implants, and everyone's invited to the orgy. my areolas are big too. I think most people have something about their body that they think is weird. It's probably a bigger deal to the person that has it rather than other people.

Hecubus, there are exceptions to nearly every statement/rule ever made and you happen to be one of them for this.  I don't know what else to say to placate you so I'll leave it at that. :oops:

To the birth control pill talk I can confirm that my sister went from C's to DD's over the course of a year of taking them. :roll:

From 32A to 36C in less than a year, here.

Was not too unhappy about that, though I missed the cute little bras.

Great. Years of birth control pills and I went from A cup at 18 to B cup at 40.
I want my money back  :( .

My birth control didn't increase my boobs at all (I was all excited that they'd make them "normal"). I'd ask for my money back but I didn't have to pay. Insurance covered them for about a year, then stopped due to something stupid. I've asked my doctor for the samples whenever I'd see her, which worked out well until the Yasmin/Yaz people stopped giving them to her. In about two months I'll be out of them, and I don't have an extra $45 a month to get more. The pill that is covered by my insurance now is horrible, it does nothing for my polycystic ovary symptoms and they makes my moods all screwy.

All of this? Pescado's fault! Oh wait, wrong thread.

Edit: "birthday control"?!

I took birth control pills for a month(not as a contraceptive) and when I went back to see my doctor I told her I wasn't taking them anymore. PMS sucks. I only needed to have it once to know how awful it is. I'm staying away from those damn pills.

I have this too, and try your damnedest to find the $45.00! If it helps control the symptoms, stay on it. I had to come off BC years ago and they have never regulated my hormones again. When I had my tubes tied, they found a cyst the size of a "baby's fist" (can't remember the actual centimeters, but do remember the doctor telling me the comparison and yes I did hurt like hell) that had almost twisted the ovary. Now at 37 I am going into early menopause because I can't take BC anymore and there is really nothing to regulate the unnatural hormonal balance that PCOS throws us into. For me, until the post menopause Estrogen (which I am in debate as to take or not), I have no options. We have as of yet to find anything that works and I actually go to one of the top OBGYNs in the area. He is the one that actually diagnosed me when all the other doctors just told me I'd never have children they didn't know what was wrong with me.

OK I think I went OT. LOL


UM my boobs are symmetrical, slightly far apart and I hate underwire. Does that put me back OT? LOL

Actually none of this is on topic. I believe the original topic was someone wanting to see a lady's penis.

maybe the moral of all this is, don't show someone your penis unless they are on birth control?

I wanna see a winkie! A good one, not one of those god aweful day-glo orange ones, either... Yuuuuuck!
There, is that better?
And I'm lopsided, too. Right side is a D, left side is a C. I can't take BC, it give me horrid migraines, complete with aura and black spotties...

I enjoy the rewrite.



Oh 4chan, you rascals, you.

Also? Splongcat says hello.

Bad pill/person combo. I can't be on the pill anymore (benign tumor on my liver that sees extra hormones and says "Eeek! Kill it! Kill it! Save some blood for later!"). But I was for years. I found that I had to be on one specific pill or I'd have cramps and moodiness (which I don't have undrugged). My HMO at the time kept changing the formulary and bumped me to other drugs, but my doctor kept writing them letters to get exceptions made for me to have Triphasil covered.

My mom had open heart surgery at the age of 32.  The reason?  The combination of birth control pills and smoking.  A very lethal combination.  I got a tubal at the age of 21.

My boobs are wide apart too. :( :cry:

Yeah, that was rude! But Gwendolyn, i've felt so in love with your avatar, who's that guy? :D

I wouldn't mind him in an erotic pose.  :shock:

$45?! I've never had to pay more than about $15 for the pill here in Iceland. Thank the pirate gods for health insurance as a birth right.

As for the boob discussion, I was wearing a 36C bra, then went and got measured. Now I'm 38F. :shock: Makes me wonder how many women must be wearing the wrong size, 'cause you might not notice how wrong a bra can be for you. And yeah I also have the far-apart problem, cleavage is a no-go for me. Has been since I was a B.

I wouldn't doubt if I was.  I haven't been measured yet--it was the summer before I started high school (going to be a senior this year, so about three years ago).  Was in Hawaii visiting my mom and we went underwear shopping.  The lady at the store just looked at me and told me to try a size.

Never deviated from that size.  >.>  I don't like trying on clothes to find the right fit, so I'll wear something that doesn't fit quite right for as long as possible.  I hate shopping with a passion.  <.<

Shopping for clothes is a lot better when you're in a store you like and you aren't with your mother. -________________________-

JC Penney = teh SUCK.

While everyone is talking about bodies and boobies , I might as well mention I'm getting plastic surgery in a few weeks. It's NOT a boob job. :shock:  I have a ton of stretch marks and my muscles are stretched from pregnancy. I don't know why I got so tore up. I gained the normal weight, just my luck or only being 5'1 who knows? My mom is short and she didn't get any. I'm really freaking at this point and everyone is sick of me talking about it , which is why I'm writing it here. :lol:  I'm worried because DAMN I know it's going to hurt like hell. I don't mind extra weight , but I can't look at my lower belly anymore because it doesn't look like me. Here is an after pic of my docs work (http://www.locateadoc.com/images/gallery/img7103after1.jpg)

While I do have a fiery hatred for my mother, I dislike shopping unless it is for food or video games.

Even when shopping by myself I find the nearest thing that doesn't look ugly and is in my size.  Then I flee (after paying).  I don't mind just being in the store and acting like an idiot in there.  It's when I know I'm there to buy clothing or shoes do I suddenly become a screaming six year old who suddenly has lost all control of her legs.  Then you have to drag me through the store, threatening that you'll put me up for adoption and that you are very disappointed in my behaviour and I will be getting NO DESSERT tonight and I better stay out of the fucking cookies or you'll whoop me to kingdom come.

Plastic surgery scares me regardless of what it's for.  Yargh, pointy thing cutting MY skin?

No problem, amazone. Here's a little bit more from the guy in my pic.

(http://i180.photobucket.com/albums/x255/Gwendolyne_/till.jpg)

Imagine the rest yourself  :roll:

I'm planning on having the exact same thing done. I haven't had a baby but I have terrible stretch marks from gaining 40 lbs in one year (blame the anti-depressants I was on at the time). I also have an abnormally large belleh, people ask me if I'm pregnant all the time. That picture looks really good, I would not mind having a belly like that!

Best of luck with your surgery, I can't have mine 'til I drop about 60 lbs.  :(

O.U.C.H.

Good luck with that. That just makes me cringe. I'll keep my baby belly, thank you.  :lol:

callmeird, I looked at every doctor from NY to florida. Some of the pictures made me wonder if a couple doctors were on drugs. This guy is good and he's in Columbus, OH. If you live near there pm me, and I'll give you his info. I'm a state away , but I've seen too many plastic surgery nightmares to not go to an experienced doctor. :shock: He is licensed every way possible, plus 15 years in practice. He doesn't overcharge and he does the surgery in a hospital, not a surgery center. I could live with the stretch marks, but it's like my skin has pulled away from whatever is under it and I have an indent in the middle. It feels wrong. I can't explain it , it's kind of like my muscles aren't over the middle of my belly. My daughter was 8lbs 12 oz , maybe she just kicked it apart. :o

alright children.. this conversation reminds me of a "little" video I saw the other day. Check it out for shits and giggles..

http://youtube.com/watch?v=Svbyc87V9pg


LG

My own belly problem is rather different I guess, I basically look like I'm about 7 months pregnant. I have to buy trousers one or two sizes bigger just because of my stomach, so they're baggy on my bum and thighs. And shirts are baggy 'round my boobs 'cause of my belly. Seriously annoying.

I'm afraid that I'm all the way over in Iceland, but luckily we have very good cosmetic surgeons here. I'm definitely doing a lot of research before picking one, it's one hell of an important decision to make. Congrats on finding a good one, hope it all goes well!

Same here. The pregnant look never went away. Some people pop right back. I HATE those bitches. (joking of course)  :lol:

:lol:

I've read (completely anecdotally) that Pilates (the original stuff, I guess) can fix up the stomach muscle problems resulting from pregnancy and obesity. One woman I was talking to specifically mentioned the feeling of her muscles not being in the right place, and pilates eventually resolving it.

Of course, this requires the motivation to stick to it. I hear some people have that. I wouldn't be one of them.

(Whoa. I am replying to an ancient thread. Go me. I could delete this so I look less silly, but I'm getting too old to care about looking silly, I suppose.)

i just wasted 16 minutes of my life reading this thread! How did such an efficient lurker like me miss 11 pages of boobie talks?
*takes a long swig of rum*

Don't you just hate it when they hide the good stuff from us?

*weeps for the lost boobies*

I kinda hate that someone bumped it to add the insightful and useful reply of:


But, hey, it's boobies after all.

Screw the boobies. This is all about our PENISES!

Sheesh.   :P

Oh yeah, and 'necromancy's bad, m'kay?'

Except when it's body parts, I guess.

PRoblem  is, for so many, it would be a very short conversation...

Oh please no, not more penii conversations...



H00r4y 4 8008135?

Nah I've got boobies and they're getting pretty boring. After you've had them since you were 8 you kinda just want them to go away. Now, about penises  :lol:

Be careful...Bionix (or however he spells it) will be posting about his again!  :lol:

Can't be worse than my boyfriend. He gets  freckle on his and goes on about it for a week.  :lol: I should probably hush.

Oh no not more Bionix penii convos!! RUUUUUN.




Boobies are annoying, yes. Now, tell that to my friend...hers are an eye magnet. She likes it. I don't get her.

Pft. It is funny when guys look. Especially when you catch them.  :D It's always fun to ask innocently "Is there something on my shirt." AKWARDDDDDDD.  :lol: But I'm just that mean err....nice not to call attention to the fact that they are staring at me.  :?

OMFG! Once was way more than enough. I'd rather set my hair on fire and run through the forum naked.

/me sets Duckie's hair on fire..... RUN NAKED DUCKIE RUN!  :lol:

Gah.....I already have nightmares!

AAAaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!

Wow was it that bad?

There are not words to describe it Love. LOL

I'm feeling smug cause I got it all on film!

I missed it the first time around so I'm glad it got bumped.  :)  At least I'm not alone in having PCOS.

The Boinx or something person convo was that the one about the elephant balls?

Would those be very large balls or wrinkly, grey ones?

Boinx (boinks? :lol:) was the one to claim his dick was three feet long or something.

Oh. Skinny white dude hung like a black dude thing?  :shock: Oh, the mental images.

Yah, I was bored enough to search it out.  I didn't want Redlove to miss out on it.   :lol:

Did you have to remind us? Now poor Evil has done the running around naked while on fire for nothing. I wonder if she needs any company.

9?? Is that centimeters?  :shock:



0_______________________________9 cm (That is 3,5 inches)
                                               



That isn't that big


Duckie, it's ok, you can dress again  :D

I couldn't stop myself.  Yah, I know, I suck.

*Sobs*

Yes, please, I could use the company...

Gwen, I thought it was being measured in microns (0.001 millimeter)...  :shock:

Poor Duckie :(

I would join in with you, but I am not a fan of setting myself on fire...

I'm not that much of a fan of self-incineration but it's preferable to hearing about Bionix's personal fantasies.

Well you KNOW why women make lousy architects, builders, surveyors, etc?

We're taught by men that this

|-----------------------------------------------------|

is six inches.

o.O

This topic really needs to DIE.

I think that is hilarious. MOAR.  :lol: God I almost pee'd on myself.

I apologize guys--I have a new computer, and the browser was being crazy.  You know on the side where it says "unread posts" "last posts" blah blah blah?  It wasn't showing up in my browser, and like a moron, I forgot to check the date of the last post in the thread...  :oops:

Never again, I promise!!!  :wink: