Who Put This There?

[Rae Kira]

It is said that like cockroaches, twinkies will survive a nuclear explosion.

[Pescado]

I won't let you ruin this Pescado I will tell you what will happen. This is how it will go: You being too big to move will have to have your groceries delivered and food made for you.

Heavens, no! That would cost MONEY! Outrageous, I tell you. Why on Earth would I do that? Considering that I've been too cheap to buy food since I was a kid, and hoarded my lunch money instead, because the idea of spending it caused physical pain, I hardly intend to change lifelong habits now.

You will have by that time gotten tired of only having salads and low fat things prepared for you.

I can't eat salads. I'm a carnivore, salads are indigestable. Hell, they're indigestable even for other humans. Salads are rabbit food. There is nothing in them that a human can actually eat.

You will have by then worked out a deal with your next door neighbor's son that you will pay him 10 bucks if he goes to McDonalds and gets you 2 big mac's 2 large fries and a diet coke each day.

*$10* for a BURGER? OUTRAGEOUS! RIPOFF! I'll stick with my cheap-as-free rats, thanks.

You, thinking you have won, will continue to grow bigger and bigger until finally they have to cut down one of your walls to get you out of your house and to the doctor. Not knowing what's wrong with you, your doctor will give up and allow you to eat what ever you want. Then, in my mind atleast, you eat so much until you burst.

You wish, puny peasant. The fact of the matter is I would sooner starve to death than eat that much. It would hurt less.

[Phelim]

Er, have I gone completely mental... or is like... Pescado acting a bit funny?  Drama Queenish?

I've read this last post he made and I kept hearing it in my head... like... Nathan Lane in the Birdcage or something.

Heavens, no! That would cost MONEY! Outrageous, I tell you.

OUTRAGEOUS!

Eh.... I just... can't quite decide.

[Marhis]

I would suggest to force the delivery carrier eat those groceries, then eat the carrier and keep the money: more food for free.

[dorquemada]

I would suggest to force the delivery carrier eat those groceries, then eat the carrier and keep the money: more food for free.

Not instantly though, because you'd just have a carrier with stomach bloated with semi-digested groceries. S/he must be left to ripen somewhere.

[Tchannie]

Phelim: I thought the same. *imagines the roaring of "OUTRAGEOUS!" and laughs loudly*

[Feverish]

What is actually a Twinkie? I REALLY don't know...

Now doesn't that make you want to run out, hop a plane to the US and eat one?  :lol:

Oh and at festivals and fairs you can now get these little artery busting gems battered and deep fried.

I absolutely hate twinkies.
They are way too sweet and make my stomache ache. (So does chocolate candy)
At our state fair you can have deep fried twinkies, deep fried snickers, deep fried peanut butter and jelly sandwiches, and deep fried ice cream(I have no idea how they manage that). And I think there's more deep fried stuff you can get too.
They try to batter-dip and fry everything here.

ETA: There's even deep fried Coca-Cola. I suppose for people who prefer to eat their drinks...

[RedLove]

Heavens, no! That would cost MONEY! Outrageous, I tell you. Why on Earth would I do that? Considering that I've been too cheap to buy food since I was a kid, and hoarded my lunch money instead, because the idea of spending it caused physical pain, I hardly intend to change lifelong habits now.


I can't eat salads. I'm a carnivore, salads are indigestable. Hell, they're indigestable even for other humans. Salads are rabbit food. There is nothing in them that a human can actually eat.

*$10* for a BURGER? OUTRAGEOUS! RIPOFF! I'll stick with my cheap-as-free rats, thanks.

You wish, puny peasant. The fact of the matter is I would sooner starve to death than eat that much. It would hurt less.

1. This was MY fantasy Pescado therefore it will all happen and YOU will not ruin it.

2. I forgot that you were cheap. I'll have to fix that part.

3. You are quite right salads are not for humans which is the reason why you turned to Mickey D's.

4. YOU GET 2 BURGERS AND 2 LARGE FRIES. Read slower man.

5. Eww you eat rats...

6. Of course I wish and I am in no way, shape, or form PUNY! I may be a peasant right now since I am completely penniless from buying this damn wireless card that I didn't need. I will not however be that way forever!

7. I'm pretty sure it would hurt to starve to death...hunger pains. But then again there's the heart attack from eating so much fat and grease.

Thanks Pescado for entertaining me in my moments of extreme boredom.

[Aquamarine]

What is actually a Twinkie? I REALLY don't know...

Now doesn't that make you want to run out, hop a plane to the US and eat one?  :lol:

Oh and at festivals and fairs you can now get these little artery busting gems battered and deep fried.

I absolutely hate twinkies.
They are way too sweet and make my stomache ache. (So does chocolate candy)
At our state fair you can have deep fried twinkies, deep fried snickers, deep fried peanut butter and jelly sandwiches, and deep fried ice cream(I have no idea how they manage that). And I think there's more deep fried stuff you can get too.
They try to batter-dip and fry everything here.

ETA: There's even deep fried Coca-Cola. I suppose for people who prefer to eat their drinks...

Hahaha, we have the same thing in the Southern part of my state. It's frightening.

I've only had the deep-fried ice cream. I can't remember what it tasted like, though;  I think the logic center of my brain shut down while trying to process the concept itself. However, I've never seen the fried Coke, and I'm wondering how many natural laws must be broken in order to produce it.

I also can't stand Twinkies - they taste like spongy chemicals with a filling made from sweetened crayons. I've only seen old people eat them, and I'm assuming this is because, once upon a time, they were actually made from REAL FOOD.

[MizzKitty]

:shock:

[Feverish]

Once upon a time I liked the Raspberry Zingers.
But the last time I tried to eat one I felt sick.
My favorite of the fried fair snacks is the funnel cake.
I love funnel cakes with strawberry topping.
I've even made them at home.

I think I'll make one later.

[Tchannie]

Those twinkies look revolting.

[Pescado]

7. I'm pretty sure it would hurt to starve to death...hunger pains. But then again there's the heart attack from eating so much fat and grease.

Yes, but spending that much money for food would hurt more. You realize I'm cheap because it causes physical pain to spend money, right? And I don't think I *CAN* get a heart attack from eating fat and grease. Nobody in my family has the problem, and I've essentially been bred to have a carnivore's digestive system. Carnivores don't have problems eating fat and grease.

[Rovam]

Phelim: I thought the same. *imagines the roaring of "OUTRAGEOUS!" and laughs loudly*

I am now totally convinced that Pescado sounds like Brian Blessed. But piratey.  

[RedLove]

7. I'm pretty sure it would hurt to starve to death...hunger pains. But then again there's the heart attack from eating so much fat and grease.

Yes, but spending that much money for food would hurt more. You realize I'm cheap because it causes physical pain to spend money, right? And I don't think I *CAN* get a heart attack from eating fat and grease. Nobody in my family has the problem, and I've essentially been bred to have a carnivore's digestive system. Carnivores don't have problems eating fat and grease.

Well actually I like spending money. Gives me that fuzzy feeling inside. And I just know you're cheap because it just seems like you would be. And you *CAN* die from a heart attack. If it clogs up your arteries or what ever it does that causes you to have a heart attack then you will. No matter how much you believe you are an almighty being, when it comes down to it you are really just a crazy, funny, little man that *CAN* die from a heart attack.